How the LL stole christmas

Disclaimer: here at FHC we always thought that LL was some kind of an orphan, born into dirt poverty like Oliver Twist. This all came as a big surprise...

So FHC is taking me to Paris.  All of you have been paying such close attention to us lately that I’m sure you already knew. Here’s the thing (shh…don’t tell FHC, I don’t want him to break up with me): I haven’t told my parents that we’re going yet.  Since this space is often used to slander les FHCzios, I thought I’d take a moment to confess that my family also is crazy.

I’ve already purchased my plane ticket home, but every time I talk to my family, my mother adds a tinge of Jewish guilt: “But you have two weeks off.  Why don’t you stay for longer?  Don’t you enjoy being with your family?”  (I do miss my dog). Her insistence has frightened me silly, and I can’t work up the courage to tell her that it’s not really an option since I’m spending New Years with my BF and meeting his family instead of being with my own. 

Now, my cowardice isn’t completely irrational:

Six Christmas’s ago I came out and was accused of “ruining Christmas.”  Four years later, my brother “ruined Christmas” and my mother subsequently threatened to end the holiday forever by moving to Israel (NDLR: next to Palestine).  That a Jew cares about having “Christmas ruined” is irrelevant – I simply can’t overcome my panic that once I tell her our plans, my mother will book the next flight on El Al and let’s face it, poor Ariel Sharon won’t even begin to understand the mess on his hands.

Wish me luck.  At least I’ve sent my Christmas list to Santa, so if all goes as planned, I’ll be well-dressed when I meet le family. 

Comments

[FHC himself...yes...yes]

Who is FHC ?

[Damien]

My boyfriend and I will be spending christmas in Paris this year. My parents said Adios. See ya next year.